Meant to Be

Is it true that everything happens for a reason? 
I believe it is.
How else could my crazy, awful, traumatic situations suddenly turn out perfectly?
Is it really all coincidence? 
I was at my breaking point, and suddenly it all came back together.
So once again I've learned that in the end everything's okay. 
Trust in Him. And trust in His timing.

He loves you.

One of those days.

It's one of those days where everything goes wrong...
It all started when our drill practice was scheduled to start at 5:30 (that's in the morning time) and of course I woke up late, therefore I had the wonderful opportunity to run laps around the track, and let me tell you, I absolutely LOATH running. 
At practice I showed everyone the most ungraceful way to fall on your butt, gave the floor a high-five with my face, and bruised my knee in a lovely pattern that somewhat resembles a flower. Then today was picture day, yes picture day, a day in which I get to have my picture taken to be put in a yearbook so random people can look at my face and laugh at how funny I look. And getting out from drill late and having less then 5 minutes to get ready did not help my situation. 
Throughout the day; I got gum stuck to the bottom of my shoe, sworn at by a angry hall-passer-byer, failed my band test (who fails band?...oh yeah, me), had yogurt explode in my backpack, forgot my Latin assignment, dropped my sucker on the floor, recieved hate glares from her and much much more...

nonetheless

There's still good to be seen, a beautiful world to appreciate... like that one girl that complimented my greasy, messy, untamed hair, or the fact that today was warm and sunny, and then of course there's my new best friend, along with the fact that I got a sucker in seminary (after the one I previously dropped on the floor), and then there's just the beautiful flowers, and people, and happiness.

So don't be sad, there's too much of that in the world today, there's always something to give you that little happy sunshine ray :)

...even if it's really hard to find

Happy Monday?

Sometimes life can be a whirlwind of emotion; with unexpected things flying at you, and at first you try to hold on, but eventually you let go and get caught up in everything else. everything spins in circles- seemingly endless- and all you can do is try to survive. and for some strange reason the storm always seems to intensify on the fabulous day called Monday.

Happy Monday?...yeah biggest oxymoron ever

but I can't complain too much:

• he remembered who i was
• we talked and ate lunch together
• for the first time in a while i didn't spend every second thinking about the other guy...even if he was sitting across the way with her
• i got all my homework in
• i didn't have a total and complete breakdown in the hall

...so I'd say it was a pretty successful day.

and now I have tomorrow to look forward to. Have a happy Monday! 

At times in our life 

we'll find that we'll fall,

so that when we stand

we'll stand that much more tall

Hey, I'm back...

I'm not quite sure why I'm trying this whole blogging thing again...

maybe it's because I'm utterly bored, or because I actually talked to the girl whose blog I'm secretly infatuated with, or maybe because life suddenly became so complicated that I'm hoping that by writing it all out somehow it will make more sense.
Well, I haven't written for a while. (obviously.) In fact, I wasn't even 16 when I posted that last post.
A lot has changed since then.
I've gone on my first dates, driven my own car, met new people, had new adventures, and now I'm a junior in high school.
Summer was incredible and I'm sad to see it go. I enjoyed those late nights, in the warm summer air, looking at the stars and talking to each other, feeling like we were the only ones in the whole wide world. I'll miss the bucket list adventures and the crazy expeditions the we went on as the best friends that we were. I'm going to have to get used to not knowing what he's doing every second of the day, because just in the first week of school a whole lot has changed.
Walking down the hall I see him with her every where I go. I sit next to them at lunch but it's like I'm not even there. It's like I don't exist during those school hours, but as soon as that last bell rings, I hear my phone buzz and there's his little apology message...but then nothing changes the next day.
But it's okay! This ^ whatever-you-want-to-call-it mess has maybe given me a new best friend, a boy that the second I met him I felt like I'd known him for all of my existence. It was at the football game, standing in line for drinks, and from that moment on we never stopped talking to each other. Within the first 4 hours of knowing one other, we knew the others whole life story. I'm not sure what will come of this instant friendship process that we experienced...I have no clue if he'll even recognize me on Monday, but at the moment I'm willing to risk it because I'm not sure who else I can even rely on. I just have to tell myself that in the end everything will work out.  

What do I do?

I really need to get over him,

Everyday I desperately look for sign that he still likes me,

when in reality I know he doesn't,

but I have hopelessly fallen in a trap,

and I don't know how to get out,

I follow him around like a little puppy,

I attempt to talk to him and make a fool out of myself,

I try and create this relationship that truly never was,

and definitely never will be,

I really need to just get over it and move on with my life...

but there's that small part of me that wants to hold on,

hold on to that small strand of hope that stills remains,

I will continue to dream, to watch and to hope,

and I guess what ever happens was meant to be,

right?

I'm back to where I was... and I wish I wasn't here...but what can I do? 

Is that what I need to do?

...or is just one reason enough?

Well I guess there's always hope...